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Reality in Erotic Fiction

If one spends much time on erotic story sites, one will read some stories that sound so real they “feel” like the telling of a true situation with only the names changed to protect the guilty.  Others aren’t quite as believable for a variety of reasons.

What makes any story seem real is the characters, what those characters say and do, and how other characters react to them.  If those characters say and do things most people would do or say, it’s easy to think they’re real. If, when reading, you find yourself thinking, “I don’t know anybody who’d say something like that”, you’ll probably dismiss that character and the story as just poorly written fiction.

I’m not saying some of the dialogue between characters I’ve read is totally unbelievable.  Although I’ve never in my life had a woman gasp and then scream, “Fuck my tight wet pussy with your big thick cock”, it’s entirely possible I just haven’t met her yet.  I hate to admit it, but my cock isn’t all that big either, so maybe that’s the reason.  

I could believe that character is real if she’s been established as different in the descriptions and actions leading up to that point.  If she just blurts that out the first time she’s in bed with the guy, sorry, but most real women wouldn’t do that.

If your thing is writing porn for people who like reading porn, none of the above applies so go for it.  Porn is a caricature of life designed to only titillate lovers of porn, so anything goes and usually the more unbelievable the better.  If you’re more into writing believable stuff, there are a few more things that are not as convenient as we might like, but nonetheless are things with which real people have real experience.

Women aren’t usually gorgeous and men aren’t usually handsome studs.  Most people fall into the “all right to pretty good” categories.  That doesn’t mean they can’t have the same drives and abilities as the gorgeous and handsome people.  Some are probably better, even the ones that don’t quite make it up to “all right”.  All you have to do is write them that way.

Society and advertising have caused women to usually think they’re too fat and they go to great lengths to hide any parts they think look bigger than the models in magazines.  “Think” is the operative word here.  Except for breast size, almost all women think they’re bigger than they really are.  For most women, this is their tummy, hips, and thighs.  Parading her around in a string bikini or in her bra and panties or naked isn’t going to happen in real life unless she’s really young and slender or she knows everybody watching really, really well.  

Small-breasted women are often self-conscious about their size.  They think because men drool over well-endowed women in men’s magazines, a woman with small breasts doesn’t have a chance.  She’s not going to strip, cup her “A” cups and ask the guy what he thinks.  It’s more likely she’ll want to keep her bra on, at least the first time.

For a few women, pregnancy doesn’t seem to cause stretch marks and after carrying a child, things seem to go back to how they were before all by themselves, but they’re exceptions.  Most women have stretch marks after pregnancy, and they have a difficult time losing what they call “baby weight”.  If she’s had kids, chances are she’ll never show her tummy to anybody unless she’s sleeping with them, and even then probably not the first time. If she’s an exception, either because she’s one of the former or because she’s either proud of her new body or doesn’t care, the writer needs to establish that before she grins and strips naked while the guy watches.

While society has stretched the bounds of what’s acceptable relative to women and sex, most still are relatively modest and conservative about hopping in the sack and they’re a little afraid of the first time.  They also view sex as an emotional as well as a physical experience.  Women don’t typically strip naked and then beg to be screwed even after several dates.  She’ll want to feel something for the guy before she does anything like that.  As with anything else, there are exceptions, but they’re not the rule.

Young men often do find older women attractive and erotic, but all older women aren’t the so-called “cougars” that appear in some erotic stories.  Most are just ordinary women who may like sex but won’t be on the hunt for a young stud.  They require a bit of soul-searching or convincing before hopping into bed with a younger guy.  There are exceptions though, and if your female character is a cougar, you need to give her that personality sometime before she tells the young guy she wants to fuck him until she drains him dry.  Both can make a good story.

Older guys are about the same.  Most young women will think, “not even a mercy fuck”, if an older guy starts talking about some bedroom fun.  Older men are well aware of that fact, so they might think about it, but won’t propose anything.  The woman who does like older men will probably be doing the seducing instead of the other way around.

While we’re on the subject of older men and young women, young women aren’t fooled when the forty-five year old guy shaves his head so he doesn’t have a bald spot and dresses like he’s twenty.  They may smile when he talks to them, but inside, they’re probably laughing at his attempt to regain his lost youth.  They’re not going to agree to hop in the sack with him unless they’re already into older guys.

It’s tough to be your own critic, but once you’ve written something, stop and ask yourself, would I do that, or would my boyfriend/girlfriend/wife/husband/brother/sister/mother/father do that?  If the answer is probably not, most people probably won’t believe it either unless you give them explanation of why they should.  Successful authors all know this and if you watch how they write as well as what they write, you’ll see them painting their characters with a different brush long before those characters do anything out of the ordinary.  Here’s a quote to chew on before you write the next story.


“Don’t expect the puppets of your mind to become the people of your story. If they are not realities in your own mind, there is no mysterious alchemy in ink and paper that will turn wooden figures into flesh and blood.”
—Leslie Gordon Barnard